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A Simple Death
A squirrel died in the parking lot today. It seemed like a suicide, the way it just ran out in front of the neighbor’s truck. I could hear the pop of its skull crushing under the tire from my balcony. I instantly felt sick. I’m not normally squeamish, but this was a bit much.
My neighbor stopped and checked his tire and threw the squirrel into the rhododendrons by its tail before going on about his day. I wanted to say something to him, but the moment passed and I was silent. I never got the chance to comment on the man’s callousness.
There are some stories that wait forever for someone to tell them. They sit in the minds of the most ordinary people and go to waste. I wanted to know what my neighbor was thinking. I know the squirrel was just an animal and animals die, but it seemed to me that there should’ve
been more ceremony to it than a simple sling of the carcass into the bushes. Maybe not a prayer or anything, but a moment spent considering that part of the world was indelibly changed. Death shouldn’t be so cavalier, even if it is a small death.
After my neighbor made his way out of the parking lot, I finished my cigarette and went inside and sat down to write. The squirrel stayed
with me like a ghost. I heard the pop of its skull giving way over and over. I saw the blood and brains. I watched the body fly end for end into the shrubbery. I wrote a poem, deleted it and wrote another only to delete it too. I was distracted and pained. I didn’t see myself in the squirrel, but I saw a loss and that loss went without mourning or notice.
Giving up on words for the moment, I went into the bushes and dug a small hole with my hands. I laid the squirrel in it and covered the whole thing with dirt. I might have been overly sentimental, but I felt better.
William L. Alton was born November 5, 1969 and started writing in the Eighties while incarcerated in a psychiatric prison. Since then his work has appeared in Main Channel Voices, World Audience and Breadcrumb Scabs among others. In 2010, he was nominated for a Pushcart Prize. He has published one book titled Heroes of Silence. He earned his both BA and MFA in Creative Writing from Pacific University in Forest Grove, Oregon where he continues to live.
Email: William L. Alton
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