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Interconnection
-Excuse me, is this car yours?
-Yes, it is. Is there a problem?
-No. Just a slight inconvenience. My foot is under its wheel.
- Oh! Does it hurt?
-Well, a little. Feels like it might burst in a minute.
-And how did your foot get under my wheel?
- I don’t know. Ask yourself. I was here when you came quietly with your new car and parked without looking.
- Oh, I'm really sorry!
-Don’t worry. There are worse things. But I would appreciate if you moved the car
-In other circumstances I would be more than willing to do so, but I'm late for an appointment and if I’m late it would look bad.
-I don’t want to cause you any trouble, really, but I'm not keeping my foot under your wheel for so long. It’s starting to hurt. A lot, if I am to be precise.
- What a disappointment! Would you mind waiting two hours? I don’t think it will take more than that.
-I could wait. I would be here until doomsday, if that will avoid any problems. But my foot ... I do not know if the pressure will hold ... How heavy is your car?
-I don’t know. I didn’t ask when I bought it.
-I don’t know figure it out. But it’s a lot, believe me. At least that is what my foot tells me.
- Can’t you get it out yourself?
-How?
-I don’t know, move it. Maybe the wheel is not crushing the entire foot, only a small part.
- I will try. (Silence and effort followed by a couple of groans). No, I'm afraid it is completely over.
- Damn! (Check the clock). She’ll kill me!
- Who?
-I don’t think that is your business.
-Sorry. I didn’t want to intrude.
-But you did.
-Excuse me. I just want to get my foot out from under your car and go home. I’m not asking for much.
-I know, and I'm sorry. I can’t do anything for you. I have to go.
- Wait!
- What do you want now?
- What if we push the car?
-I told you that I'm late for an appointment.
- Is she beautiful?
- There you go again meddling in my affairs!
- Just wondering if she is beautiful!
- Yes, she is! But it's not what you think. It's just work.
-Ah, work ...
- What does that mean?
-Nothing, nothing. I'm not suggesting anything.
-I'm going. I can’t be late.
- What does your wife think about this?
- What?
-Your wife. Does she think you’re being unfaithful?
- How do you know I'm married?
- Oh, pure intuition, believe me! Am I right?
-Er ... Yes.
- Magnificent! Can you get the car off my foot? I think she would mind her lover having helped a poor fool.
-You don’t know that woman. Her character is insufferable.
-And why are you with her?
-I like her.
- You like her?
-I like her.
- What’s about your wife?
-It's different.
-Well, if it’s different, you should not be very nice to her, don’t you think?
- Hey!
- I hear!
-You have no right to interfere in my private life.
-If my foot wasn’t stuck under your car, I would have no intention of doing so.
- Do you want me to move the car?
-Yes.
- Reverse?
-Please.
- Does it hurt your foot?
-It’s about to die. Does that make it clear?
-Well, fuck you!
- What? Hey, don’t go!
-I'll see you later. This has gone too far.
- Damn!
Oscar Varona is a writer but nobody thinks he is; a librarian who doesn’t feel like he’s one; a loser… of time who has published a book of short stories Tremolo; a weirdo who has published short stories in e-zines in Argentina, Mexico, the US, and Spain. A bored animal who works on an arty e-zine called Delirio. An unhealthy smoker born in Madrid, Spain, 40 years ago, who draws and makes collages about strange things. He still fights against dumb publishers and best-seller readers.
Email: Oscar Varona
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