March 2010
VOL XVIII, Issue 03, Number 203
Editor: Klaus J. Gerken
Production Editor: Heather Ferguson
European Editor: Mois Benarroch
Contributing Editors: Michael Collings; Jack R. Wesdorp; Oswald Le Winter
Previous Associate Editors: Igal Koshevoy; Evan Light; Pedro Sena
ISSN 1480-6401
Juniper
by
Jack R. Wesdorp
Juniper is beauty incarnate, Aphrodite emergant, the pieta denudata,
the shekinah divinorum, our sighle claddagh, goddess therebint
enthroned on the precipice, we revere her as mother earth
and sister moon, as the ourobouros that englobes manifest, the spirit
that nurtures life and love. We cannot look away.
Jack R. Wesdorp
Juniper
(1770-1838)
Juniper:
After I discovered boys
the way was clear forever.
Aphrodite of one voice
with all the gods in heaven.
Boys would kill to get at me,
that was a revelation,
both a penitentiary
and cause for celebration.
Great responsibility,
I did not take this lightly,
I would anoint the pillar
with honesty and mighty
as befits divine élan.
All the women of the world
embody love and beauty,
out of us a god is born
and whoring is our duty,
beyond that we nurse the sick
though we ourselves may perish,
trim the convent candlewick
our troth to hold and cherish,
winnow grain and mother grief
beside the field and cradle,
be thou heaven’s hand weaving
wizard cloth nor be afraid
of mere death. This we believe.
Every bonavent confronts
the rationale of hooking
when all we own is our cunt
and fortunate good looking,
some of us espouse the stage,
its lure and adulation
in the face of mummer’s wage
or frowsy fascination.
Sundays I stood on the pier
with sundry other strumpets
flabbergast by gnawing fear,
we wish you well young brothers
before the mast. We’ll be here!
When I was a tavern slink
I lived above a crockster,
worked at brewing winterbink
alembic barley smocker.
That attracted grotty sorts
the likes of binkel blarney,
edelbarf and hackermort,
dykstra, the dink, and smarmy.
Peril stalks bodacious snatch,
many’s the night when knock knock
there’s potential at my latch,
could be delight or pockmark
demented bastard splatter.
In those days we took defense
by living close a’calling,
get our crazy gook incensed
you’ll god damn get a mauling,
though I never needed that.
The physik brewer loved me
living there above his flat,
wouldn’t do to piss him off,
next time you’ll buy some poison.
No, he couldn’t afford me,
mostly so I had my choice
of privateer deportment
and the dads of boasting boys.
Thus I waxed successful at
the art of pleasing fathers,
I’m blessed with easy slattern
although they’re far more bother.
Husbands are a chatty crowd
who want to bend my earful,
all about their marriage proud
and how they’re wending fearful
the old whistle’s freaking flub
my trixie’s hexed it awful…
I get it peeled in the tub
kneeling dextrous eat it raw.
Always fixes ’em right up.
There’s no shortage on divorce
so I got mint impressive,
that afforded me a horse
and millinery dresses.
I moved off the beaten path;
above an apotheker,
three rooms with a heated bath
adjoining a bakery;
Invitations, patronage,
a skipper on my dance card,
dates at the masonic lodge,
john, men, ships, mansions, gardens,
and then that magick … called Fate.
Friday the thirteenth high noon
john carver brought me roses,
I’d been riding, it was june,
my mantel clock stood frozen,
I remember in color,
in slow motion effigy
while he’s kneeling on the floor,
“I want you to pose for me,
a figure so explicit
to make the universe blush,
I’ll screw your ass to a spit,”
and with that he plunks a purse
of clinking gold at my feet
no perhaps, permit, or please,
just this glitter sparkling heat
from my breasts down to my knees,
john bowed on wide burnished boards
supplicant before his art,
and I heard these distant words
bells resonant in my heart:
This is the one who loves you
go with him for life my dear.
For better or for worse then,
mandorla in a clearing
in a forest, endless doors
where god can hear us singing.
You should say something sincere,
some clever plum, he’s waiting
for you to speak, seems like years,
I thought yes!, fascinating,
time kept leaking away slow
to a place reserved for it
glowing with elastic flow
into curved infinitive
dust shimmering and smoking,
I’d just turned nineteen in may,
women passed through glass joking,
john uncorked wine, sweet champagne,
pop! it swam into focus.
I smelled Luck, grab hold of that,
let me describe us fucking.
Rabid alley cats from hell
well-mannered ribald ruckus
does you like this don’t you dare
careful with that doesn’t hurt
spurt in there make a baby
maybe we should wait a while
pile it in there butter jam
dammit miss I think you’re knocked
probably should get married
don’t think too good mister cock
parenthood ain’t so scary.
Nine months later junie moon
because we hatched her swiftly,
our only child. I was ruined
as a whore, we lived thrifty
in john’s studio those years,
a series of life carvings
well respected by his peers,
intricate things, marvelous,
ANGEL WITH A SCARF that’s me
and the cedar DEMETER,
crested bust of athena,
also the MAY QUEEN and FATE
but the best were just plain me.
Captain Goonarr Stuurelaar
commissioned a figurehead.
That’s the one that traveled far,
a lurid piece of jiggle
bedroom eyes you fuck me now,
imperious I love you
set astraddle bucking bow
one boob above hail mary.
Stuurelaar’s enchanting mass
that reeks of rotten bondage.
I hear those gobs ream my ass,
they draw lots for the honor,
god help them before the mast.
Yet the figure filled a niche,
divine unclothed bravura.
Despite its faults we got rich,
a slightly skewed curedemal.
I still don’t know how that works.
“Ain’t that the bawdy harlot?”
We ignored their crawler smirks,
avoided snotty parlors.
Notoriety reaps good,
museums offered filthy
doubloons for RED RIDING HOOD,
enough to make me shiver.
We moved to the High Head woods.
Junie’d just escaped her crib
some powdered wig sent a scroll,
real parchment signet ribbon
esquire blah blah holy shit!
he wants to give us money…
sprach night lawyerese…ah, claim,
palaver oozing honey
passbook in your daughter’s name,
signed seamen’s bank good gravy
more signatures, judge, bailiff,
our coy kabouter’s navy
and boys we’re sailing sailing
over the bounding waves. Hoy!
Brassbound coffer full of pearls,
they issued one each wednesday,
junie moon’s a jewel girl
raised on fishy benison.
Didn’t change john’s dailies much
nor his djinn’s diaspora,
every maple burl he touched
assumed religious aura,
smelled of apple cherry birch,
expensive persian lacquer,
and would he please cherubim
build some stops for the tracker
in a boston big cheese church?
I considered nursing school
which seemed a long excursion
away from john and jewelkid,
not to mention incursions
into our sex and sugar.
What I settled on was plain,
practical, and possible,
I got my training solo.
Boston?---that’s another track.
A pilgrimage proper goal;
at no time did I ever
think the practice might kill me.
Would that have stopped me? Never.
We do it because we’re called,
that quiet little niggle,
or your libido’s at fault
and you’re shit out of jiggle.
Had a lot of grief with that;
john slaved to keep it moxie,
kept it wet and flattered me
with devidet and doxie.
Nonetheless my fuck me! failed,
something to do with hormones,
the humors in your bailey,
hunted by a ruinous worm
that spits balefire and doom.
“Sex ain’t everything,” john said,
witness god such prophecy,
“I’ll love you more when I’m dead,”
he didn’t hint it’d be me.
Helltown in august ran rife
with typhoid, pox, and fuzztongue;
surgeons used a cauter knife
and bodies fed big buzzards.
Not enough to eat this week
was a scullery complaint,
children suffered hot red-cheek,
mom’s sulfur breath, I feel faint,
deathbed stuffing reeks of rot.
Junie left home and came back,
the world out there lay supine,
john got grey and built a shack
out in the dunes with lupines
and roses surrounding it.
Things happen for a reason,
summer flight and winter bound
each child unto her season.
Time ran kite strings through my mind,
wrote loops around my body,
fifty eight years got behind,
only then did I dear god
notice john was going blind.
Evil wends at night we’re told,
I held a lilac lantern,
leaving venison and gold
my lady of the shanties.
It’s the best I ever did,
it pleases me my daughter
to help them that’s on the skids
come hell or freezing water.
We burned frankincense and myrrh,
faith in the ancient manner,
john faded bent with worry
that his wife and child wander
naked but for their courage.
Grace is a curious state,
she walks in self sufficient
perdurabo conflagrate
calculatus omniscient.
Even so we’d rather not
know the deft of our dying,
when to go, whyfore our lot,
who’s left to do the crying.
John stalked this beast to its lair,
wrung from it my dates and due;
he sacrificed our pear tree
for his final work; he knew
it would be diphtheria.
I ignored it seven years.
When it comes it’s insistent.
I wouldn’t let them near me,
better to just disappear.
I walked to the shack John built,
he followed me there that night
with our oldest ragged quilt
bathed in liquid colored light.
We talked through the open door.
Those last days were very good
encircled by rose of thorn,
proper princess pricklewood,
I was his favorite whore,
that’s what he said in his mind
more alive than ever now.
I heard him collecting pine,
pile up fragrant cedar boughs,
that day the wind came up fierce.
I died in that worn-out quilt
wrapped in only one man’s tears,
my fire was born brilliant,
I watched it burn from High Head
well into the night of day,
thank god no one’s really dead.
I waved, then I turned away
to a wheel where time is fled.
There’s much to be thankful for.
Love persists in her greening
and I saw my grandson born,
john was always seventeen
in his head and heart and balls,
I’m sure he never drifted
despite a sculptor’s carte blanche,
enough compass well sifted,
room to navigate our course,
saw it bloom from perspectives
like parallax, lightning force,
and how it’s all connected,
each strand back home to the source.
John ran! home; he couldn’t wait.
My ashes blew, departed,
in his mind I roamed a great
concourse of jewel washed stars,
by his hand I could sense me
become real in the hourglass,
expand, grow dense, wood yet free
flower crowned fascinating
aphrodite at her best,
they’ll display me in churches,
circumspect at summer fest,
may bunting, mistress birches,
electric cunt, blessings, come!
He laid his hand to our wood
set on a granite dais,
a chunk of trunk with the root
attached worthy of the christ.
He contemplated the left,
my head canted waging war,
I’ll be bondaged with my cleft
spread apart in scarlet rage.
Then he meditated right,
elbows bent, knees to receive,
maidenhead yes wet inside,
breathing hard heaving breasts please
fuck me either way don’t wait.
When my image enters men
in their most secret being,
binding feminine privilege,
they’ll find what they’ve been seeking
in the ancient universe.
This is of necessity
god arranging boon or curse
according to their questing.
Sexual girl sculptures comprise
essential reality,
curling pontifex all rise
pallast spellwyst wenchling doll
I conjure thee with my eyes!
Chisel to the wood at once
before the candle gutters.
Voodoo wizard halo krans
down to her fondle slutter,
I can hear him mutter soft
parsing in a strand of tress
dear how often have I laid
my hand on that curve of breast
or splatt into your maiden,
turn your cradle knee some more
arching back yes pointed feet
I implore thee chancel me,
feel my heat anoint your dance.
How the architect fashions
reality from darkness:
first the concave saw and adze
to rough out five main markers,
head hands and feet, then a plane
and draw knife englobe her breasts,
careful there, cut with the grain,
always take a little less,
so, rasp and file her nipples
make ’em stand up like you’ve just,
flow along her belly hips
thighs inside our crucial lust,
gouge it with a bent spoonbit,
barely ghost her veil gently,
make it deep enough to fit
his most heroic entry,
and for the fine tracery
of hair and face perfections
a convex micro veiner
stare all you like at her sex.
Then the sanding paper grit
delicate round her eyelids,
curling fall at throat and nape,
rouge her lips with glad surprise,
then a floating wash in soap
to swell the grain but fleeting,
swaddled turpentine in rope,
let it dry under sheeting,
tomorrow peach blushing stain
soft gold ring wedding garnish,
final detail through the grain
and then transparent varnish
linseed rub my john’s insane.
Then…silence…the hand fell still,
a tool clattered decisive
on the floor. Brilliant sunset
over the bay. Priceless time
spent staring at nothing bed
another day, gravity,
try not to think, take a walk
no not on the beach where we.
Juniper. The burning ends,
he’ll get a little comfort
at the Mermaid with old friends;
you can’t tell he worked it blind,
there’s no evidence of pain,
one last caress, crate, consigned
to a church in Bangor, Maine,
noted for its pagan rites.
So what does the goddess do
when she retires from earth?
Build a fire, lose my shoes,
rest my feet up on the hearth,
sip honey mead alembic
fill that goblet one two times
let’s see how I got dented
any kills or karmic crimes?
Expert lovers, faithful friends,
separate paths, famous names,
surely we’ll love you again,
beautiful parallel flames,
we were very good, ahhmen.
Her image
Painted papyrus
Cathedral stained glass
Medieval church halls
Palatial reliefs
Frescoed on plaster
And lace curtain weave
In alabaster
Museum design
Carrera marble
Dynasty china
In andesite garb
Sometimes I’m standing
More often enthroned
Sovereign handed
Frozen word ready
To step into stone
Wherefore do love me.
Juniper (c) 2010 by Jack R. Wesdorp
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