MICE AND OTHER SLAUGHTERED ANIMALS by Klaus J.Gerken 1992 I drafted you a letter I poisoned it with ink It melted in the moonlight It drowned where lovers drink But you only thought of beauty Your hair was wild and mean You stepped into the silence And made a shallow scene I drafted you some verses I crafted you in dreams My knees were torn and tattered The blood was love's canteen I tore my arm with laughter I poisoned with pale ink It swelled up in the moonlight And was wrapped in holy lint Coda Now hate me if you have to I did not turn into a heifer I did not rape and plunder I did not ask for your surrender Your garrison is fine Copyright (c) 1992 Klaus J. Gerken REVENGE One night alone I could not sleep and spoke with the shade of Hamlet who had manifested in the mirror he said: As to sleep I cannot tell whether it is real or not - I have never slept unless unsteady troubles haunt my night - It is the avenging of the unavenged. I did not answer, but filled days into a dream. I dreamt I stood upon a parapet and looked across a moor - the night was lit by a pale pale moon: I heard the hunter and the hunted, and the owl's too-hoot aggrieved my mind; revenge is always near. Copyright (c) 1992 Klaus J. Gerken I was standing near the barn when I heard her false alarm oh I never thought she would come to me for protection and cast me away afterwards Oh I never thought the sky could be so red but the sunlight through her window sorely bled with angel hung upside down in the celestial harmony of things and after love she said I cannot understand this why use condoms why not live to die I was like a secret mirror I was like a cave I was empty I was hollow I was full of rage Exploring unknown alleys I came upon a lady who said she never left me It was me who left her after all I was standing near the bedroom when I heard her loving her... It was like a cod-fish laughing... after all they fought the war It struck me absurd I fled into another ink well and stepped onto a fictionalized lilliputian shore Her holy works collected in a broken heap reaping shallow shorelines where crustations die unseen I saw one tear another but food is only food and dream is just a dream and sometimes life's so mean If Noah had been present he would have laughed his head off and left the bloody scene I rattled stcks of prophesy I consulted the I Ching I broke apart a diamond and found it quite obscene I wore my armour I had my shield I had a lance and sword of finest steel I slept in a Rosicrucian cellar theis penthouse was too clean I wasted all my honey in an argument I lost The oven wasn't good enough it was covered by the frost You never smell the stench when you touch a tv screen But this is not a TV set the Keiser was a lot like you and I. Give the vampire credit Wine is not like blood The milk of God is sour The christ-child is still-born I'm hollow of commitment Don't expect my nature to be suffering the crown or thorns I was healthy I was common I was like a knight insane burnt alive in armour for the devil in his train Today the inquisition is not conspicuous It hides behind the curtains and the bedroom of our minds I falter and I stumble I'm read o many rights I don't know which is better to stay or just to hide they won't leave me alone again I gave them my opinion they've made me statistic to substantiate a politician's alibi So I go back to Miranda I set fire to the barn I purge myself of slavery and run into her arms But Marinda does not want me she loves 'another one' So I ship out from here tomorrow I'll row into the dawn I'll sing my halleluja And ask for any storm I don't know where life takes us but of this I can be sure what is now considered the cellar was once the ground floor. Copyright (c) 1992 Klaus J. Gerken Did you ever see a lab assistant handle mice? I always knew God was that gentle, concerned and cruel. Copyright (c) 1992 Klaus J. Gerken GRANADE I pulled the pin because I thought didn't love me when you said you did I tried to push the pin back in Boom. Copyright (c) Klaus J Gerken 1992 Let's read Payton Place together in the bath Collecting every moment in the nature of the trash And acting out the devil in the before-and-after-fact "I don't know", she yawned, "I'd rather go to bed". Copyright (c) 1992 Klaus J. Gerken Will you marry me she said and I said No I know that she was shocked but I also knew myself regardless what she said I could never be the person that she wanted me to be I was frozen in displacement and she was dreaming too unreal I didn't say I loved her, but I did I was like a corpse unjealous I was thinking how to tell Her that the monument of intervention was love - and only love. Copyright (c) Klaus J. Gerken 1992 Will it not be marvellous with the bride and rose with the virgin and the empty cabinet will it not be trick or treat when the enemy comes home will it not be thorns again will it not be blood upon another shattered alter stone? Will you not carry flowers to the deepest off-shore grave will not our survival look like death? will not silence force an ending will not God be in your eye will not joyous dancing bring the dead to life again again again only to be turned to dust again? The temple is the shadow the temple is the wound five rose petals and a stem of heavy thorns the knights of solomon are extant they gather in each heart they are the burning ember of what we knew as truth but little is remembered we hide ourselves in books in TV sets and radios Copyright (c) 1992 Klaus J. Gerken THEY TEAR UP THE ROOTS I made preparations I tear at my hair I ask the flogged savior to silence me with fear I displace the wholesome meaning of who i have not been I harvest all the anger I gathered when she left I asked for some more solitude I got a window filled with noise - oh gall! but better than nothing the genes of druids the sheltered concerns I gather a meaning while my heart it just burns. Copyright (c) 1992 Klaus J. Gerken I never saw you naked I never saw you whole You were like a persion carpet MArk Anthony unrolled A camera-obscura a shadow in my soul You were there when they committed your jester to the coals I saw you cry like rose-dew in the morning shifting fog you bent to touch a rose-trellis and a frog jumped off a log I watched you from the window the air was chill and cold you vanished in hazyiness no poet could control from deep inside the castle a radiance appeared I never saw you naked now a ghost - I hardly care. Copyright (c) 1992 Klaus J. Gerken It is hardly ever what the wind took up But what the wind blew down: It is hardly ever the love you lost but the life you drown. Copyright (c) 1992 Klaus J. Gerken (for Johanna) I am an Xmas tree I am an Xmas tree I am filled with light I am a green quest for life and the holy grail I am the light of all your principle I am what moves I am God the holy I am the beggar I am poor I am the rich man I am the savior on an unknown shore I am an Xmas tree I am an Xmas tree filled with light Gerken We spoke again today for the first time in a year you looked so very beautiful I couldn't even fear I was the first to offer congratulations I was happy for what you have accomplished You spoke to me like a friend I am gratefull for that one But the past is still the master Although I try so hard to hide Tess said: "You will never hide it" I'm afraid, Tess, you are right. But love is like a river It changes, always changes yet always looks the same I cannot get away from that Copyright (c) 1992 (921208) Klaus J. Gerken (for Johanna) I was dying like a saint when I realized I was human and fled. Copyright (c) 1992 Klaus J. Gerken I am a complete insanity I am a raging volcano I am el nino I am **** My girlfriend came over Set's up my christmass tree While the Prime Minister stes the Hill on fire And in Cambodia starving children smile I listen to Bob Dylan And scratched my rash to breathe I was rememberng the holocaust But only tourist took their ounce of ash The cave was lit so darkly the candle wanted wax the pyramid was like a pigmey beneith a sky of flax Columbus lost his fingers for things he shouldn't touch No wonder the Madonna made him pawn his ring The walls hold up the ceiling the plaster's like a monk I roll upon my carpet Cleopatra doesn't ask I glue myself together A partial alibi gathers a momentum "It's work that sets one free" The absurd revolution gathers neith the moon 15 paper roses feed me with a spoon made of finest plastic (I knew it wasn't real) But Eva just exploded and Adolph couldn't feel The hunchback had a feeling but Madonna couldn't peel what the farmer tried to water and the stripper couldn't steal I left without my sandwich I ran into the night I thought that I was conquered Johanna said that I was right I left without my shadow I prayed inside a shed I left the corner drug store with a plastic sheaf instead Malinda thought Ophelia had possession of her soul Maybe I was Hamlet But good Ezra screamed "You're full...!" I slipped into the sunlight I was naked as a fool Who loved you like a savior Who kept to every rule Who measured pride with valour and strayed into the dawn who sang just like a troubador and wept within your arms But rain exempted meaning The mob was very calm the flight leutenant wavered but the refugee kept warm and the silly girl collided with the virgin and the whore and the babies on the threshing floor were basic whole and pure I survayed the flat desire I saw in every eye I tried to laminate each soul and staple visions to the sky but there was no surrender the alley was supreme the shore was like a dagger and the drunk was cought between Oh sometimes I remember when young and I was told never wander to the harbour never taste life manifold and yet I scraped the window clear of all the ice] and I cought the horizon dispell those vampire lies So now the candle burning the wax melts to the ground I pray to gods you wont remember but I pray gods may be found for after all the window is the mirror of our soul and the unknown god in silence gathers what we know So pray to us a meaning the edge is mighty sharp the future is tomorrow and it's just another start Malinda waves goodbye to me as the ship sails out of port somehow this can never be what we want in a resort. 8/12/92 Gerken I was walking through the graveyard and the leaves got in my toes I was smelling wilted roses and the wind got in my clothes There's the moon that wears dark glasses There's the sun that shines at night There's the dung pile hid Ulysseys To get out of a good fight. I was ralking with a vampire over services controlled I was half in a contortion She said "silver" I said "gold" There's a building in St Louis I have never seen but heard and I heard it in a news cast with my tv set disturbed I was ripping up the paper with a story line of hope It was christmas it was easter It was nothing like we hoped I was lying in your cradle I was lost within your charms I was trying to discover Another continent to Arm We were half committed to the thunder-blast of God But we loved the money better Now we plant seeds in the sod Oh and was I ever lonely No, I was hopelessly enslaved Yesterday we built a ladder Today we dig a grave. Gerken 9-11/12/92 You left your ring on the table You left without a sound even the door closed slowly and sleep overcame the hound I was sitting on the sofa I was watching my TV Although the screen was empty I saw the imagery I put your ring upon my finger It didn't fit: I wore it well I knew this tribulation Was Virgil sent to Hell And death was my own diamond And the walls were paper thin I heard a couple loving In a wilderness of Sin Was ever such a monster I never looked inside If your heart was a disaster Mine was filled with pride. Gerken 9/12/92 You see this diamond in the sun You see there's love for everyone There's a home we cannot shun And I will offer you the reed I do not gather lightly The sail before the storm Your eyes are slightly jealous Your tongue is newly born Your eyes are bleeding violets they shed a plethora of tears I will not make you promise You weren't the kind to fear We tore back from the alter where Cain preformed his part They were the perfect brothers They made a perfect start But God tore them assunder He kept his anger thin He made what forced the future And made us pawn the ring I froze when you developed a raging storm within A man must still be nurtured when a woman tears his skin I loved where no one saw me I wore a furry hat You wore a diamong bracelet And we danced love's mat I felt you plunge the dagger Deep inside my heart That is when you left me To make a better start I will not shadow box it I will not speak it ill If heaven were the master I would gladly rot in Hell. Gerken 10/12/92 Like a knight on fire like a river the choir like a paper enquirer like a wasted desire I have felt the walls touch me I have felt what God must be I have argued in silence I have prayed Like a baby unborn like a mother with horns like a weather report like a ship without port I have sailed into waters no columbus could charter I have made you my savior I have prayed I a failior Like a worn weather marker like a thatched roof assunder like a field without fodder like a rope without order I have held you in loving I have have lost you when hating what cannot be relating I have prayed for the coming of commitment and cunning I have always known nothing I have rectified nothing I have sacrificed nothing I have been what you wanted never been whay you needed never been your confessor never argued with water never been there a father never known my own children never know what you cried for always been soft and silent always known when to hide it always understood prayer never once said a prayer don't you think there a savior don't you think I'm a failior Like a showow obscura on the walls of our ferver there we made love together there we stained each new letter I have made the clear offer with a diamond so proper but there was not clear answere I remember the silence I cannot hear excuses there cannot be excuses but there were these excuses no one said them too loudly now i wipe away ending that had such a beginning and i pray with no words here what are words to a failior what should come when the shadow overtakes such an omen I for one have no easel I for one have no knife I far one keep on hearing "Here's an ear for the bride..." K. Gerken (c) Copyright 1992 (921215) The storm rages like a skin on fire Unsoothed upon a leper's couch Made the guilty ever prick the brier Made the hungry sore upon the mouth Oh what vile and hornet's nest of thought Produces death's pale shadow of a ghost Who seeks revenge upon a past's harangue Who strikes the bones upon a drum skin tought I have made this plenty into one last feast Given in advancement of the grail The blood which flows untarnished still Beneith the surface of life's ill It is not you nor I that languish here We serve a greater cause beyond life's care. (921220) Copyright (c) 1992 Klaus J. Gerken You have not mastered what the oak Produces in abundance The forest is not strong and we Are evil in the path we clear There are silences upon the foot Where neither beast not fowl Would stand beneith out gratitude There is little that is not our rout We have taken what was not our own We have given nothing back We have settled with a black burnt offering Upon a fertile ground and made it rock We have parched the country of our birth And we have called it Eden: look around. (921220) Copyright (c) 1992 Klaus J. Gerken In my singing I have given you the breath of song And made it something special in your sight and on You have been a gentle wind upon the summer grass Had I your hand in mine we would not let this moment pass Within the marvel of a garden yet untuched By human thought and opportunity I have painted you a rose upon the bark Come see what I have made: it brings light to the dark. But yet the moment shone where no one mortal had yet been Where we were trespassers within the scope of our return The serpent hissed away the guiding stars And we were lost again in Paridise Lost in truth or was it yet delusion fear and lies? (921220) Copyright (c) 1992 Klaus J. Gerken Paint me in a greater picture The partridge and the berry bush Paint me there five hundred pilgrims Praying on a rocky shore Paint me what the natives saw Of the bold invaders from afar Paint me what was never said Or said too often and forgot Paint for me a holocaust Years before the camps and ovens Paint for me the poverty Of a nation now in ruins Paint for me the poverty We as overlords have given them We have never owned this land We who stole the garden to grow weeds They say our God is just and good But our God allows the slaughter of the good Tell me friends if this our God were Just Would he still allow our prayers to be answered? Perhaps the history could not be stopped Perhaps had no Columbus come it still would be the same The world grows smaller every day Or is it just the conquerors who want more land? 921220 Copyright (c) 1992 Klaus J. Gerken There is a passion that is no more Than an obliteration of the facts It is called solitude and it stabs you in the back Not just once but all the times you shrink from the attack It is a failior to confront yourself It is the enemy that cannot be avoided You gather an illusion and you falter fast Upon the road of no returning I was once so full of life I guarantee That it was fear that made me creep within The cave that shelted old King Lear But he was mad and I am delegated to the sane But that was then and this is now I am not a failior but I am a man in pain Gerken 921221 Lady you have bridled me and blinded both mine eyes You have made the serpent to resemble God's own lie You have cast the devil down and somehow he got up And paid you for the service he made for me a map Which argued in the celler for the celler of your heart And forced me to forgive you but I cannot be that bad I was one too foolish to admid to your so foolish charms Now confined to this poor dungeon I admit that you do harm You give no one a flavour but a poison that delays Its work into the passages that form the alley way Into the heart or head or be it soul or mood You are the one they wanted it was never understood Were I the one with freedom I would strangle you for sure Not the diamonds in you necklace would save you from that cure. Gerken 921221 There was once a woman she had auburn hair she promised me the mountains but her darkness cast no flare she was soft and in her silence she brough beauty to the night she was silver in the valley and the drunkards won her fights She came to see me naked Dance beneith the moon She laughed like Marlene Dietrich And hummed a gentle tune She raised me in a blanket To become a soft caccoon And I loved her in the silence Where the sober drunkards swooned She said she was the daughter Of Job and his cruel God But she nurtured me with flowers And she gave me what she had She tuched me in the moonlight And she raised me on a cloud She told me I was Satan She made me feel so proud I walked into a hallway Lined with canvasses They were stained with some solution It was images I think And these images they told me Of the sunlight and the sea And I thought of Ay the Pharoeh How he set the Isrealites free I saw upon the TV The contortions of a child Lost within it's poverty Lost with it's fright And I said to my companion There is nothing here that's right And my companion called it murder And I heard the echo scream I was tired of forgiveness I walked into a church I asked the priest for water he coucelled me on mirth I looked at the blond alter And the image of a God The priest said pray I couldn't Give the priest another thought I was lost in my own harbour I was frightened of the pain I would feel when I confronted My ancestry again There was nothing I could give them I was human after all They said I had this history I was at a loss apalled I refused to wear their armour I was like a knight alone exiled from the castle he had always called his home but the exile cost him nothing there were wars enough to cope destruction is a savior for those who long for hope So this lady I followed made me into stone she offered forgiveness and left me alone and I froze where the moon was and the river was dry there was a fisherman crying and be damned I knew why Gerken 921221