Wasted People and other poems by Klaus J. Gerken Wasted People we are the wasted people the old men and women who live alone in poverty and violence who can't even get the city to provide them with a bench to sit on we are the forgotten ones the lost souls who worked hard all their lives to be spat upon and told that what you did in the past is no longer valid you no longer pay taxes you are a leech to society younger kids (everyone's a kid to us now) no longer display manners (well, some do) they shove you aside iphone in hand too busy to notice they cal you fat and ugly and useless there is no longer an ideal where age is valued you forget one thing and they call it dementia and you you in prison oh not one with bars (though it might as well be) but restrictions to keep you alive as a vegetable institutionalized your possessions confiscated and your life erased memories are no longer what they used to be with every part of our lives measured and psychoanalyzed what have we become but excrement in a government test tube vladimir holan said it best: "to be, you would have to live, but you will not be because you aren't alive... and if i haven't killed myself it is only that my life is not my own and i still love someone because i love myself... to be is not easy... shitting is easy..." we are the wasted people the ones you hardly notice on your way to work busy like a termite building ever higher mounds to impress the multitude who worship money more than love we are the ones who gave you life protected you thought you but now we have nothing left to offer but our wrinkles skin and failing memory there is a sadness not in what becomes of us but a sadness what becomes of you the future generations forever wanting life shunning death thoughts of death images of death elders close to death the dying so to speak We are the useless ones the "has beens" history no longer appeals to those who would go forward we just drag you down can't keep up with the camel camel sure ain't gonna slow down for you can't lose that extra penny god forbid which one all i guess ain't never gonna slow down for the "open-hearted many the broken-hearted few" you see it on the news each day the elders who keep active the elders who are not a drain on society or health care money but the cheaters are tolerated the hang-nail exploiters of the ER they're fine but not the old and needy who paid all their lives for heath care services... not them not the old and wasted not the forgotten living only the forgotten dead are remembered We are the shadows lurking in the sunshine of your present-moment lives you don't see the future and you do not see the past you only see yourselves in a mirror a false image created by yourselves to reflect what you believe yourselves to be but the image is false arrogant and ego-bloated you want the future to be yours rightly so but not by steeping on those who built your foundation the old and wrinkled ones the ancient ones the lore-givers wise haired ones the ones who built on the foundations of others and others and others from the beginning of civilisation but remember babel and the scattering of tongues you will never achieve the end of your beginning by ignoring those who know what are you over and over chose to ignore your heritage your elders and your beginning we are the hope of your future quite forgotten in your past we are the hunched over crippled ones who came before made your paths by the work you don't remember what is that on your wall for those who even ask as certificate 30 years 35 40 even golden handshake you're retired now your job upgraded and no longer valid forget the past service free now you can do anything you want travel visit your children go dancing laugh sit in a rocking chair you earned it see you around sometime and remember if you visit us at work you will need an escort your security clearance no longer valid not that we don't trust but you know the rules and remember that non-disclosure agreement can't write a book about what happened here we'll come and get you if you do so you sell the house retire to a condo or an apartment enjoy your memories and become a nobody just another elder on the books of government statistics a burden on health care walking with a walker to the store and yet no bench to sit upon we took them away they say because the homeless sleep on them at night so you have nothing to rest on in the day don't want the midnight tourists to get the wrong impression of our wonderful all-inclusive senior-friendly city we are the disenfranchised the invisible visible the major minority the usefull useless back broken from a life time of labour out of connection no loger valued out of sinc with today's society if we're lucky we get a pat on the head good job now go away We are not the vengeful we have our regrets but we do not chose them they are given us by the nature of aging parting is our only regret parting from loved ones parting from what mattered somehow no more We are the substance in a hollow land the invisible the disrespected the lost the empty the fleeced the discarded rotery phones in a wifi world where everyone is wired and no one understands silence any longer we are the wasted people the old men and women who live alone in poverty and violence who can't even get the city to provide them with a bench to sit on kjg 545am 1 aug 2013 848pm 1 aug 2013 845pm 2 aug 2013 636pm 4 aug 2013 * I just realised the difference between god and me: God demands obedience from his subjects; I take care of my cats and demand nothing from them; I prefer me. kjg 9pm 2 aug 2013 * OM If there is any justice in the universe I will be reincarnated as God. kjg 941pm 2 aug 2013 for Seymour Mayne * Hava The mother of God is called Mary Hava only set the stage to shine. kjg 946pm 2 aug 2013 * I see I'm losing FB friends again. Gotta stay away from the God thing. Here's one no one can object to: Roses are purple Butterscotch brown If you live in the moment Don't drown. kjg 945pm 2 aug 2013 * From Martial: If it's total nonsense what I say, Why do you bother reading it anyway? kjg 957pm 2 aug 2013 (adapted by memory). * Just remember, a critic who hates your work, makes a living from the experience. kjg 1015pm 2 aug 2013 * Up 320am. Had the weirdest dream. I dreamed some native teenager was killed due to neglect and the people responsible (military) were invited to the village for the funeral. I was there as a reporter. The soldiers were there partying and very disrespectful so I was the only one who went to the ceremony. Some animal changed into a person and went back to the village with us. When the soldiers boarded the bus I walked away and passed this person who nodded at me and then they killed the soldiers. Next I was back in the house where I was staying and the woman showed me how she converted closets in the house for homeless people to sleep in. "They need to sleep somewhere," she said. Then back in Ottawa with other reporters and they were trying to locate the village on the map but couldn't, so i tried to show them and the village was gone! ---- Up and shaking now. Feel Jazzie's isolation... kjg 340am 4 aug 2013 * nothing works anymore kjg 638pm 4 aug 2013 * Here's a song I was singing in my dream - the guitar rift is out of this world (obviously!) Gotta wake up to drown (rift in) Honey don't love me Gotta go scream Honey don't love me Why be so mean Gotta wake up to drown Gotta wake up to drown (rift) No houses standing A terrible mess Give her a shekel For a new dress Gotta wake up to drown Gotta wake up to drown (rift) No houses standing A terrible mess Give her a shekel For a new dress Gotta wake up to drown Gotta wake up to drown (rift) Honey don't love me Gotta go scream Honey don't love me Why be so mean Gotta wake up to drown Gotta wake up to drown (rift and out) kjg 320am? 5 Aug 2013 * Ancient summation of men and women: Women make things; Men break things. kjg 11 aug 2013 * Master says: Don't bring diamonds. Pupil asks why. Masters says: Too shallow! kjg 232am 12 aug 2013 * The Masks The masks at midnight will reveal the truth Once taken off cannot be undone. kjg 238am 12 aug 2013 * Truth I am struggling with the truth As truth struggles with a lie As both merge into one Annihilate each other. kjg 241am 12 aug 2013 * be afraid oh the father comes a calling and the daughter is in fright there' s semi-automatic in his hand that isn't right he's committed to purpose and it's not what you might think he'll take his daughter out tonight and purposefully drink you see she's now at legal age where she can own a gun and papa's gonna teach her well to be scared of everyone and why is she in fright you ask she's fourteen and she wears a mask. kjg 512am 13 aug 2013 * Political Fools There've a political agenda And they NEVER fool around They're tight lipped in the enda And they whimper when they drown. kjg 528am 13 aug 2013 * Master sneezes. Pupil says: Gesundheit! Master mumbles: At least someone's still alive... kjg 1152pm 15 Aug 2013 * Pupil says: Silence is golden! Master retorts: Then why are you speaking? kjg 351pm 16 Aug 2013 * Zombie dance go to the left go to the right wag your tail and cry alright catch a spider in redress classic moments are the best jump to your right jump to your left do a cartwheel in a dress purple white who is blessed c'mon baby we're the best exon's trendy what a gas see the comet what a blast cruise the strip ain't it cool like a diamond tempts the fool kjg 652 16 aug 2013 * Where/Here/There. Really? Where I was when I wasn't I was here to compare where I wasn't. kjg 946pm 16 aug 2013 * When in spring Do the Bing! kjg 949pm 16 aug 2013 * Silent Noise Stills. kjg 356am 17 aug 2013 * Spring Breezes Tickle. kjg 357am 17 aug 2013 * Floating Paper Lands. kjg 358am 17 aug 2013 * Vinho Verde Grips. kjg 4am 17 aug 2013 * One Word Stays. kjg 403am 17 aug 2013 * Morbid Sky Twists kjg 17 aug 2013 * Hollow Noise Irritates kjg 1157pm 17 Aug 2013 * Shattered Mind Dreams. kjg 1204am 18 aug 2013 * I will promise to leave those who believe in God to God if they promise to leave me to me. kjg 18 aug 2013 * Broken Sometimes there is a branch that breaks when the white dove of peace perches. kjg 18 aug 2013 * There's a quick fix to everything; Just let the wormhole in! kjg 757am 18 aug 2013 * Exploited Wonder Wastes. kjg 854am 18 aug 2013 * Aged I am not a broken vessel; so don't treat me like one. Cracked and chipped maybe, but not broken. kjg 18 Aug 2013 * When Orion is high in the sky The end of summer is neigh! kjg 406am 19 aug 2013 (from Hesiod) * Rejection Slip to someone My mind is reeling with words So incomprehensible it hurts! kjg 409am 19 aug 2013 * God's ultimate illusion destroyed I came to you as GOD; I leave with a whimper and a thought: What the Hell went wrong? kjg 434am 19 aug 2013 * simple song don't piss me off don't make me cry i think i'm shy i don't know why it's hard to say life's like a day without a cake i don't get paid for saying this give me a kiss wet nose is bliss i need a rake for heaven's sake there's more to this than meets the eye i don't know why i think i'm shy don't piss me off i might just laugh! kjg 1002pm 20 aug 2013 * Morning Rumble Distant rumble in the dark dark skies There's a sadness where the hubris lies There's a swollen indiscretion too I wasn't in your argument I thought you knew I need a light bulb it's so dark in here The yellow glow is just a rancid tear The walls are moist and there's a creaking where The joints don't work you through the dare I'd like to stay but really now Can you conclude what transpires in the glow Where even shadows somehow fear to go I won't make use of logic here The din is greater than the ear can hear Sometimes what is right cannot be shared. kjg 854am 22 Aug 2013 * Premonition There is a shadow on the sidewalk There is an ant in the shadow There is a foot that steps on the ant You gotta go when you got to! kjg 945am 22 aug 2013 * War My mind's of the opinion that war is a dominion it conquers every one of us with a shadow and a tear We fight for our survival and downplay every rival war is no solution it doesn't conquer fear So if you want a tactic that works for any sceptic try to talk to strangers and listen with your ears. kjg 952am 22 aug 2013 * Thou Shalt Not Kill God Spake: Thou Shalt not kill (others of your kind); everyone else is chicken fodder; Do thou as thou pleases! Amen/Amun Break the bread and run! kjg 1050am 22 aug 2013 * Master asks pupil: Why do you use big words expressing simple thoughts? Pupil answers: To impress you , master! Master retorts: Meaningless rigmarole! Pupils asks: What? Master reiterates: Useless crap! kjg 1059am 22 aug 2013 * Credibility If a soldier tells me war is hell, I believe him. If a professor, who has never been to war, provides me with dissertation as to why war is hell, I throw it in the garbage. kjg 11am 22 aug 2013 * Dreamscape I love the way bookbindings smell on a humid day; Something like hashish when the mind's a world away! kjg 130pm 22 aug 2013 * song do what you gotta do if you wait it won't come to you the world doesn't cater in unless you're the president life might be messy now don't make it worse somehow stress tightens up your butt hemorrhoids you don't want that everything is there for you gotta go and get it too don't waver on the fence just use some common sense if inaction cuts you down you will never wear a crown even an assertive ass is better than a foolish fast kjg 530pm 24 aug 2013 * Master says: In the moment of enlightenment if doubts arrise, doubts will be the truth, enlightenment the lies. kjg 712pm 26 aug 2013 * While the master knows best, The pupils know the rest! kjg 215am 27 aug 2013 * If just one student makes a fuss remove him (or her); If the whole class makes a fuss, remove the teacher. kjg 219am 27 aug 2013 * People in society always display their finery; Too bad it's never substance, but always their periphery! kjg 228am 27 aug 2013 (from Martial) * fragment my love is like a sunkist vitamin c + d she rolls up her umbrella and never worships me and that's the way i like it i hope it sets her free i'm leaving town tomorrow i won't know where i'll be... kjg 239am 27 aug 2013 * When you get to the end of your rope make sure it isn't around your neck! kjg 245am 27 aug 2013 * Love is like a surrealist's pillow: The dreams are fine until the feathers get out! kjg 324am 27 aug 2013 * Just remember, life does not cost a cent; living does. kjg 513am 29 aug 2013 * I have spent my life trying to think in simpler and simpler terms to get to the root of things. kjg 538am 29 aug 2013 * If I weren't such a simple man, I'd probably miss the obvious. kjg 542am 29 aug 2013 * * Hell Jackhammer Eardrum Splitting there was no path lost the right one caked in mud ringworm bubbly monsters from the underground 1001 gravel pit anger bell tower reverberations brrrrrr rock drill cantos loss where nothing gathers false teeth apples where they fall cowdung madam le pomme oh shit what needs to be done needs to be done of course shadow boxing with the universe god's implosive outer/inner void not a battle but a war hope vanished panic is acute reason does not sanctify it's reasoning it's always harder on the day of reckoning bow down god is great do not question HIS authority nor the authority of those who say they speak for HIM under HIM but make laws above HIM be polite say nothing suffer in silence on the path to oblivion they control it all when you die they just replace you with another just the way it is welcome to the business as in war people are expendable lives are worth nothing where money is involved prayer pit to gods not feasible there is always a shadow lurking where the sun reveals the Aten Amun-Re hot desert dry convulsions Bastet lurks where no man dares an entrance shattered eardrums resplendent in a symphony "Wir betreten feuertrunken, Himmlische, dein Heiligtum!" it rains down manna "gather only what you need" who gathers more and on the sabbath will be stoned to death stones are not sponges chrome yellow orange in the fields at arles night sky so bright visions cannot sensor it * on my desk Latin Poetry 1957 Tacitus Annals 1962 Caterpillar Anthology 1972 somewhere in the sands of history lurks a continuum we no longer revere but dissect and slaughter by our convoluted vision of what we think should be no revision necessary ego's prevail where money slaughters sensibility rolling thunder splitting walls 5.5 rattling windows not from wind argument sick cat anxiety does not distill the brew "Less and less often now... Faith.. threshold..." Horace I, 25 dichotomy of understanding history's profile 18th century painting hanging on da Vinci's bedroom wall... tourist flock to buy the souvenirs made "locally" in China 2:46 AM shakes wine desperate struggle with oneself keyboard doesn't sit solid on desk and rattles feel hot AC off raining so much for the Perseid meteor shower but i have the nternet to show me what it's like put a piece of folded paper under my keyboard silence better than shake rattle & roll cats in the livingroom 2nd glass of wine calming down something thumped against my window but there was nothing when i looked just rain turned the AC on to rid the humidity Tylenol for the headache honey dijon hot mustard potato crisps such rollicking fun at 3:44 in the morning like a whoopie cushion without the whoop last stop at wilighbough where's the train gone fishin' isn't what i thought it would be the bills and stress still mount where is the catalyst for anything somewhere out there where the living play hell * they suck us dry because we allow them to leeches are not at fault for what they do we are at fault for not protecting ourselves from them they give us candy and we take then complain they're richer than we are and rob us of our money when were the ones who buy the candy... * the mad the wounded the obscure dying where no other flourishes thunderclap desperate awning proceed with burning feet into the gaping mouth of hell you say you are not well well there's the well drink the muddy water elixer steam vent in your mouth red tongue green face borrowed time there is no solution nor cnclusion to the violence broken arrow shard of bone scrape of skin pretend we are not hollow in the afterlife rednecked devil huffs and puffs in your domain gahter handcuffs with the gain i am never so much reasoning as bewildered even after it is done the rock drill continues pound in cage scribbling through the madness late we do not qualify what steps we take are sometimes not the steps we aught to take buy a good rake if you want to gather grass... but the hedges also need trimming and no one does that... chainsaws everywhere drill into the rock enamel of the mind... cry cry cry nerves nerves nerves drink drink drink * calm down calm down calm down you lowly beggar of the underground the din is gone but nerves are frayed even though the track's unused you still wait for the train to come the darkness at the end of the tunnel is disconcerting if not outright frightful no light no light no light heart pounds like a hammen on an anvil in your ears the mind's thoughts are waking nightmares a sink hole trembles under you no peace no sleep no gentle sigh of gathering the calm serenity of night calm down calm down calm down 556am 20 aug 2013 * Master is ill. Pupil takes master to hospital. Master is dying. Pupils ask: Who do we believe in now? Master says: Yourselves! kjg 137am 27 aug 2013 * curtain the wind has left my sails no hammer for my nails whatever happens to me now the stars will surely wail... kjg 608AM 25 aug 2013 * song when shadows hit your mind and the sky turns less than blue take on the unkind and bid a sweet ado there's more to life than sorrow there always is tomorrow but if tomorrow lingers count upon your fingers and leave it all behind when sweetness turns to sour one doesn't really scour pots and pans for hours one opens up the window to the morning of the dawn there always is tomorrow but if tomorrow lingers count upon your fingers and leave it all behind i have no further message the truth is if you get it but sometimes it escapes us when we lose what we accrue in the wilderness of sorrow there always is tomorrow but if tomorrow lingers count upon your fingers and leave it all behind kjg 205am 27 aug 2013 * All poems copyright (c) 2013 Klaus J. Gerken Published by Ygdrasil Press August 2013