Be Bright Think Right - Bullying

Learn about the complete Be Bright, Think Right program, which includes units on school bus safety, safe Internet use and respect for diversity in your community.

• What is bullying ?
• To prevent bullying
• If your child is being bullied
• After your child has been bullied
• Be proactive toward bullying

What is bullying?

Children's safety is often one of parents' main concerns. Parents today hope their children are safe at home, at school and at the playground. Despite the best precautions, there are rare cases in which your child could be a victim of bullying. The following recommendations may help your child if he/she is being bullied, or prevent your child from ever becoming a victim to bullies.

What is bullying? If a youth or a gang at school steals goods or money from your child, is insulting or shows contempt, threatens or hits your child, or forces him/her to do things against his/her will; then it's called bullying. These incidents are rare, but your child could become a victim. The following useful tips should be read and discussed with your child.

To prevent bullying

• Your child should not carry a large amount of money.
• Remind your child not to brag about owning expensive things like a Discman or electronic games.
• In the schoolyard, your child should stay where most of the kids are playing. Bullies don't like to have witnesses.
• Your child should avoid walking alone. If possible, he/she should try to walk to and from school with good friends.
• If a schoolmate hits your child, he/she should tell a supervisor or a teacher immediately.
• When using public transit, he/she should try to sit near other adults.

If your child is being bullied

• Your child must remain calm and not act scared. He/she should try not to show that he/she is upset or angry because bullies love to get a reaction. If your child stays calm and hides his/her emotions, bullies might get bored and leave him/her alone.
• Your child must answer bullies firmly in short sentences such as "Yes. No. Leave me alone." He/she musn't start a discussion or argue with bullies to provoke them.
• Remember to tell your child that violence never solved anything. Your child must avoid fighting. Should he/she feel threatened, he/she should give the bullies what they want. Remind him/her that personal property is not worth an injury.
• Your child must then observe the bullies carefully and remember as much information as possible: height, age, hair colour, clothes, etc.

After your child has been bullied

If your child has been bullied, it is important he/she tell someone as soon as possible; his/her parents, a teacher or a friend. When a child becomes a victim of bullying, it is normal to feel upset and afraid as well as being embarrassed to talk about it.

Your child has one of two choices: not to talk about it and risk that the situation gets worse, or to talk about it with someone he/she trusts, either with you his/her parents, a teacher, his/her brother or sister or even with a friend. Remember to tell him/her to talk about it. By talking, the child will begin to feel better.

Offer him/her your help. Ask him/her to talk about it. If he/she refuses to talk and you detect that something just isn't right, communicate with:

• An educator at school if the aggression has taken place at school.
• A coach or supervisor if you think the aggression is taking place during a sport or leisure activity.
• The bully's parents or any witness if the aggression is taking place in an unsupervised area (park, street, etc.).

By regularly exchanging information about your child's relationships with others (students, school educators, friends, etc.) your child will feel he/she can trust you and will tell you about the things he/she is dealing with.

If your child is being bullied, you should remind him/her that:

• he/she has the right not to be bullied.
• it is not his/her fault if she/he is bullied.
• he/she should not have to face this on his/her own and that he/she can confide in you.
• he/she should not try to tackle bullies on his/her own.

Be proactive toward bullying

If your child is being bullied, do something about it! Be proactive towards bullying. If your child tells you he/she is being bullied, do something immediately to try to find a solution as quickly as possible.

Once again, it is important to communicate with the proper authorities :

• An educator at school if the aggression has taken place at school.
• A coach or supervisor if you think the aggression has taken place during a sport or leisure activity
• The bully's parents or any witness if the aggression has taken place in an unsupervised area (park, street, etc.).
• If you need it, don't hesitate to communicate with your local police.

Links

• www.bullying.org — Where you are NOT alone
• Bullying: Information for Parents and Teachers by the London Family Court Clinic (English only)
• www.cyberbullying.ca

See also: Scouts Canada