Behold the Sidehill Gouger,
A creature of repute,
Whose most unusual attributes
Are strange, beyond dispute!

It comes in two varieties,
Does this ill-fated breed;
The "Clockwise" and the "Counters,"
And they're different indeed!

They live upon the mountain slopes,
And each must face the other,
The clockwise one's with long left legs
And contrary on t'other.

The clockwise kind must always stay
With right legs up the slope,
But "Counterclockwise" can't do that,
Reversed, they have no hope!

They never can get turned around,
For they'd be so unstable;
With left legs on the downhill side,
To balance, they're unable!

If "Clockwise" meets with "Counter,"
Even though they're feeling frisky,
They'll never raise a family,
For mating would be risky!

But there's no discrimination
'Tween these two different kinds,
And if a "Counter" meets a "Clockwise,"
No-one really minds.

They'll often pass the time of day
When meeting on the slope,
But having close relationships?
Forget it! There's no hope!

Now when they've done with chatting,
And they pass by, on their way,
If they remember words unsaid,
They're finished for that day!

They have to go right 'round the hill
Till face to face again;
For them there is no turning back,
Their chatter to sustain.

This makes the Gouger angry
As he leaves the meeting place;
The thought will be forgotten
When they're once more, face to face.

Beware the Sidehill Gouger!
When hunting, show some fear,
For while you look him in the eye,
The other's at your rear!